TED talk 5 ways to listen better

Communication= 60% listening, but we retain only 25%

Listening = making meaning from sound

How do we make meaning?

* Pattern recognition: distinguish noise from signal, cocktail party effect

* Differencing: e.g. if listening to constant pink noise, after a few minutes we cease to hear it

* Filters: culture, language, values, beliefs, attitudes, expectations, intentions. All affect what we retain from listening.

Why are we 'losing our listening'?

* Recording technology: text, audio, video, the need for accurate listening has decreased

* Noise: the world is noisy, hard to listen, tiring to listen

* Impatient: We want soundbites instead of oratory

* Desensitized: media headlines become increasingly sensational, harder to pay attention to the subtle, the understated

Conscious listening = understanding

Exercises for conscious listening

* Silence: 3 minutes a day to 'reset ears' - somewhere quiet if absolute silence is impossible

* Mixer: sound mixing board metaphor - e.g. listen in a coffee shop or somewhere 'peaceful' like a lake and ask 'How many distinct individual channels can I hear?'

* Savoring: enjoy mundane sounds like a kettle boiling or a washing machine "the hidden choir, it's around us all the time"

* Listening positions: active/passive, reductive/expansive, critical/empathetic - consider the viewpoint you're listening from

Use RASA:

* Receive - pay attention to the person

* Appreciate - feedback noises 'mmm' 'OK'

* Summarize - "So.." "What you're saying is.."

* Ask questions afterward

"Live to listen"

Listening should be taught as a skill in schools